Burns Suppers: Kilt, Dancing & Murder Etiquette
Today Scots celebrate Burns Night, their most prominent and least violent national holiday. If you’re visiting Scotland or have Scottish ex-pat neighbors, you may be invited to a Burns Supper. If...
View ArticleSt. Darwin Day
Today is Charles Darwin’s 203rd birthday, so I wish to extend holiday greetings to any devout atheists or agnostics planning to attend services. There are services, incidentally. They’re called...
View ArticleTeddy Roosevelt Didn’t Exist (and Other Interesting Presidential Facts)
Normally for Presidents’ Day I dress up like Abraham Lincoln and wait outside Ford’s Theater with a hip flask trying to start fights with Southerners. Unfortunately this year I left my Lincoln costume...
View ArticlePranks Mean “I Love You”
All of the best holidays go on long past their actual calendar date. Christmas trees stick around until June, and isn’t the best trick-or-treating done on a crisp February dawn? April Fool’s is no...
View ArticleBastille Day
Saturday I celebrated Bastille Day by eating snails, sipping a glass of Pinot and sprinting away whenever I spotted a German. July 14th is Bastille Day, the feted national holiday of our friends and...
View ArticleThe Greatest Time in All of Human History
This Thanksgiving, when you are slumped over in a rocking chair trying to sweat out your triptofin and wine, consider this: right now is the best time in all of human history. Yes, there is a...
View ArticleSanta Clause Around the World
Most other countries are not America. Yet. The curious reader might ask, “How do all these non-American countries go about celebrating Christmas, then? Also do these countries have oil we can take?”...
View ArticleAttack Beavers & Thanksgiving
We didn’t force Naomi to eat a turkey, but we considered making her shoot one. She is a vegetarian for health reasons, so my brother and I supposed that it would be fine to take her bow hunting down...
View ArticleGood King Wenceslas, Savior of the Poor
Merry Christmas, everyone! This year the very talented and felonious Andrew Young and I teamed up with Adam Young to illustrate our annual yuletide YouTube video. Thus we give you, “Good King...
View ArticleThe Prince and I
Happy New Year, friends and neighbors! I hope your New Year’s Eve was as good as mine. (Pro tip: eat an entire pizza by yourself, pass out for an hour, then start drinking other people’s booze. You...
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